Conclusion of Holiday Series #11

[calic0cat]

Heero lifted the huge pot full of peeled and sliced potatoes and set it aside. Dodging through the busy kitchen, he retrieved another large sack of potatoes and lugged it back to his work area. Within a few minutes, he was resuming his previous routine. Scrub, peel, slice, then on to the next potato. Not a difficult task, just a highly repetitious one.

'Only one more bag to go after this one. Wonder what task Father O'Brien will assign me to next...'

Considering how quickly he was working his way through the potatoes, Heero was betting that he'd get the job of cleaning and chopping vegetables for salad. He was pretty handy with a knife. 'Of course, if Duo was here and in peak condition, he'd have finished *all* the potatoes now. He's even more efficient with a knife than I am.'

Heero suppressed the urge to sigh. He wished that Duo *was* in good enough shape to be here. Or that at least he could be at home with Duo. This really wasn't the way he'd intended to spend the first day of his Christmas holiday; he'd been looking forward to a day of taking care of his partner. Plying Duo with his favourite foods, curling up on the couch together and watching classic Christmas movies... Coddling his lover and just letting it sink in that Duo really *was* safely home and getting better...

'But this is important to Duo. He never forgets just how important the church's community service work was to him and the other homeless. Doing his part to pass those benefits on to others means a lot to him...'

Enough that Heero had known Duo wouldn't be able to really rest today if Heero didn't take his place. 'I just hope that he *is* resting. And that Quatre was able to persuade him to let someone come over and stay with him for the day.' He hadn't even had to suggest it. As soon as Heero had called to tell Quatre that he would be gone all day taking over Duo's volunteer duties, the blond had immediately volunteered to make sure that Duo was alright. Though that still didn't stop Heero from worrying.

'Maybe I'll take a short break once I'm done with the potatoes. Call home just to make sure that everything's okay.'

***

"Sit. Wait." Duo ordered firmly. Chocolate quivered with excitement but obeyed. Duo swung his good arm cautiously, careful not to stress his bad leg as he shifted his weight, then gave the ball an underhand toss and released the dog with a sharp, "Go!" Chocolate took off like a shot, racing the length of the small backyard and snatching the ball out of the air with an exuberant leap.

Duo grinned as the lab turned and tore back to him at top speed. He gave a silent, one-handed signal as the dog approached. Chocolate obediently threw on the brakes and dropped to a sit directly in front of him. Duo held out his hand and ordered, "Give." He frowned sternly and cleared his throat when the ball was not immediately released. After a brief hesitation, Chocolate let go and the ball dropped into Duo's hand. "Good dog," he praised immediately, relieved that Chocolate hadn't decided to play keep-away as the young dog occasionally did. There was no way that he was in shape to wrestle the ball away from fifty-plus pounds of energetic Labrador.

Another hand signal was given and the dog darted around behind Duo, plopping back into a sit once he was in proper heeling position. Duo gave him a quick scratch behind the ears as reward before repeating the whole exercise.

A dozen throws later, Duo shivered and reluctantly told Chocolate, "All done, Choc." He'd dressed for the cold but the wind was working its way through the warm clothing and he couldn't afford to get chilled while he was still recovering. The dog's ears drooped and his tail sagged but he followed Duo back inside without protest.

'I'll just heat up some soup for lunch, then take another nap,' Duo decided as he shrugged out of his coat. He wanted to be well-rested and relaxed for tomorrow. Not so much because it was Christmas as because Heero would be home all day. If Heero was still in full-blown worrywart-mode, he was going to need every bit of patience that he possessed. It wouldn't be fair to lose his temper at his lover just because Heero was concerned for his welfare.

Duo had to remind himself of that fact as the phone started to ring before he even made it to the kitchen. God only knew who would be calling this time. He thought that he'd convinced Quatre not to call back but there was no telling who else Heero might have got to check up on him.

***

"Hello?"

Heero frowned slightly. Duo sounded a bit out of breath. "Duo? Are you okay? You sound..."

An exasperated voice cut him off. "Ro, I'm *fine*. I just had to hurry to get the phone 'cause I didn't want somebody panicking if it went to the answering machine. After all, it might have been Quatre calling *again* worrying about poor helpless little ol' me being home all alone. Gee, wonder how he found out *that* little piece of information, huh?"

Wincing at the sarcastic tone, Heero decided unhappily that any chance of spending any part of today coddling his partner had just vanished. Duo's tolerance for being fussed over had finally run out. "I'm sorry," he began.

Duo cut him off again, "No, you're not. You're just sorry you got caught."

Sometimes, Duo knew him a little *too* well. "I..."

"Heero. I am an adult. I am perfectly capable of spending the day by myself. Yeah, I was pretty sick but I'm okay now; they wouldn't have let me out of the hospital if I wasn't. Stop being such a damn worrywart, for god's sake!"

'Shit. He's really pissed off...' Heero fumbled for words, not sure what he could say that wouldn't end up making Duo even more upset with him. Maybe there wasn't anything "safe" to say. Maybe he'd better just get off the phone and let Duo cool off. Worry about smoothing things over in person after he got home.

Quietly, Heero said, "You were right, they were shorthanded. It's a good thing that I came; I'd better get back to work. I just...

"I just wanted to hear your voice so I'd know that you were okay." The admission slipped out almost involuntarily. Hastily, worried that Duo might take his remark as an attempt at emotional blackmail rather than a confession of simple truth, Heero continued, "I shouldn't be too late getting home; there's another shift of volunteers coming in to help serve and handle cleanup. I'll see you later, bye." He disconnected the call without waiting for a response.

Maybe he was overreacting and being overprotective. But Duo had been so very sick, had come so damn close to dying, and there had been absolutely *nothing* that Heero could do to help...

He'd *hated* that feeling of helplessness, of uselessness. Now that Duo was home, Heero had hoped that he would be able to take care of him, make a fuss over him, be able to actually *do* something to help him get better. But circumstances had dictated that he'd had to work during Duo's first few days home, days during which Duo had tolerated the coddling lavished on him by their friends, and now it looked like he'd missed his chance. 'I know that I have to back off or he'll just end up pushing himself too hard trying to prove a point...' Heero admitted reluctantly.

He just didn't know whether he could actually make himself follow through on that knowledge.

***

"Aw, *crap*." Duo stared at the phone and wished that Heero hadn't been quite so quick to hang up. "Now I feel like an absolute asshole," he muttered guiltily. He knew that Heero's worry was in direct proportion to how much Heero cared about him and that Heero's overprotectiveness was just the result of Duo's illness having scared the hell out of him, that it didn't have anything to do with Heero thinking that he was weak or helpless. He just...

"I just can't put those damn street instincts completely behind me..." he admitted out loud. On the streets, it hadn't mattered how sick or weak you were, you *always* looked after yourself. The slightest sign of vulnerability spelt disaster, especially for a kid on his own as he'd been during his second period on the streets. And even in a gang, it was important to resume full independence as quickly as possible after an illness or injury. Even the most loyal of gangs couldn't afford to support a weak member indefinitely. It simply wasn't possible.

Chocolate's damp nose nudging his hand insistently drew Duo out of his introspection and he ruffled the dog's ears affectionately. "Yeah, Choc, I know. Things are different now. I know Ro'd look after me forever if he had to, 'cause I'd do the same for him. Changin' habits - *instincts* - isn't quite as simple as knowing that, though..." Much as he wished that were the case. Duo sighed and gave the lab a final pat before limping off to fix lunch and take his noon dose of medication.

This wasn't the first time that he and Heero had run into difficulties with issues from their pasts and it sure as hell wouldn't be the last, either. At least past experience meant that Duo knew how he needed to handle this one in order to start working through it. He owed Heero both an apology and an explanation for starters. Then they'd spend the rest of the day curled up together on the couch, sipping hot chocolate and talking things through while the stereo played Christmas music quietly in the background.

***

Wearily - and a bit warily - Heero opened the front door and entered the condo. Soft strains of an instrumental Christmas arrangement were faintly audible as he stored his coat and boots in the closet. With a sigh of relief, Heero relaxed. Duo must be in a better mood.

Glancing into the livingroom as he headed down the hall, Heero spotted Duo stretched out on the couch, a warm fleece blanket draped over his sleeping form. Lying quietly on the floor beside Duo, Chocolate thumped his tail without offering to get up. Heero smiled softly, then slipped down the hall in search of his camera, wanting to capture the peaceful scene.

In the bedroom, his favourite sweats were laid out on the bed along with a note suggesting, "Hot chocolate and a cuddle would be a nice wake-up call." The smile turned to a grin. Duo was *definitely* in a better mood. And it sounded like maybe he was even prepared to put up with a bit of coddling along with the cuddling. 'Take that photo, grab a quick shower, then I'll be more than happy to fulfill his request,' Heero thought, his earlier weariness fading rapidly. Maybe some of his previous plans for the day could be salvaged and Christmas Eve wouldn't be a total loss after all.

***

"Mmm..." Duo hummed contentedly. He parted his lips in invitation and the kiss deepened briefly. He opened his eyes slowly, blinking away the last traces of sleep as Heero ended the kiss. Raising one hand to caress Heero's cheek, Duo murmured, "Just what I wanted for Christmas. Chocolate-flavoured kisses from the man I love."

"Wish you'd told me that before I braved the mall..." Heero teased.

Duo gave a quiet huff of laughter. "Ah hah, did you hear that, Choc? Now I *know* he loves me - he braved the *mall* for me," he proclaimed loudly and dramatically. The dog barked sharply in response to Duo's exuberant tone.

Heero's grin in response to the remark looked a bit strained. Taking a guess at the cause, Duo sobered and struggled into a sitting position. "C'mere," he ordered, holding out his good arm. "Seems to me there was something about cuddling in the request I left..." As Heero complied, Duo added seriously, "I know you love me and that you're just worried about me, Ro. I shouldn't have blown up at you like that; I'm sorry."

"You warned me not to push my luck..." Heero responded quietly. "I didn't listen. I should have respected your wishes."

Duo sighed. "Yeah, well, calling Quat so that he'd check up on me was kinda out of line. If he hadn't called already, I wouldn't have gotten all bent out of shape by your call. I really am okay on my own, Ro; I don't need a babysitter.

"But you were right about me needing to take things slow and easy. I've slept most of the day. And my arm and leg ache if I use them very much. There's no way I'd have been able to handle volunteering today." Duo kissed Heero tenderly. "Thank you for taking my place; it means a lot to me."

"You're welcome."

Silence fell for a few minutes as they simply soaked in each other's presence, letting go of the tension caused by the earlier dissension. Chocolate flopped down on the floor at their feet and tipped onto his side, stomach facing them, to demand a belly rub. Heero gave a soft snort of amusement and complied.

"Sometimes I wonder who's training who around here..." Duo muttered as the dog thwapped his foot with one paw, clearly demanding that Duo pay attention to him too.

"Only sometimes?" Heero queried as he leaned over to snag the mugs of hot chocolate from the coffee table.

Duo accepted his and sipped at it cautiously. Good. It had cooled just enough to drink without burning his mouth. "Well, okay. Maybe more like 'most of the time'," he admitted in rueful amusement. "It's an ongoing struggle not to spoil him rotten."

"I wish you'd let me spoil you a little bit, especially right now..."

Grimacing at the wistful tone, Duo offered, "Ro, I'll try. I don't know how much fussing I can put up with, though."

"I don't understand why it's so hard for you to let me take care of you..."

"I've been doin' a little thinking about that. See, on the streets..." As Duo launched into his explanation, he was very aware of how much his life had changed from those days, of how fortunate he'd been. At the church, Father had made them count their blessings on Christmas Eve - probably in hopes that it would lessen the disappointment of the oh-so-practical gifts on Christmas Day. Tonight, Duo was very aware of his blessings.

Of how blessed he was to be here, like this, right now. Blessed to have a home and enough to eat. Blessed to have good friends like the other former Gundam pilots. Blessed to be alive and on the road to recovery, however long and frustrating it might seem at times. Blessed to have a life partner who loved and accepted him, quirks and faults and all, and who he loved just as unconditionally in return. Their relationship wasn't always easy. But neither of them took it for granted; they kept working at it and it continued to deepen and mature.

No matter what sort of presents Christmas Day might bring, Duo knew that he wouldn't be disappointed. His Christmas Eve blessings were all that he needed. And they would stay with him all the year through.

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Comments

[calic0cat.livejournal.com]

Thanks! I wanted to show some other aspects of their relationship and the hurt/comfort gave me the opportunity to do so. They don't always get along perfectly but they love and respect each other enough to think things through and settle their differences.